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8-11-04: The Fonzie Glass
Insert hackneyed catchphrase here!
Have you ever poured yourself a glass of water? Probably you have, but I'm willing to bet that you never looked upon your boring old drinking glass afterwards and thought, "Boy, this glass would sure be a lot better if TV's Arthur Fonzarelli was on it." Rational minds just don't think that way.
Not every human on the planet owns a rational mind, however. Yes, it's true: someone actually acted upon their desire to see an image of the Fonz on a drinking glass. The legendary Fonzie Glass exists, and I'm here to review it for all you lucky greasers out there. Sit on it!
The first thing you see when you look at the Fonzie Glass is...well, the Fonz. He's all over it, and he looks like he's having a good time. (In case you don't recognize him on sight, the words "The Fonz" are helpfully supplied in a white spray-paint font. I would have preferred an exclamation point here, or maybe two, but hey.
The above image of the Fonz isn't quite as good as the first. At first glance you might not even recognize him immediately as the Fonz, and that's a definite flaw; if there's one thing I expect from Fonzie Glasses, it's the quick and easy identification of Fonzie on them. Fortunately, as I mentioned, the words "The Fonz" are written near this questionable image, and I'm going to guess that this usually clears up any confusion.
Behind the Fonz is a brick wall--also a bit of a disappointment. On the one hand, it's a fairly neutral background, and it makes it easy to see Fonzie in all his greaser glory...but on the other hand, it's not very flashy or interesting. Still, the background does look like a place where the Fonz might hang out, and considering how badly they could have screwed up in this particular area (putting other Happy Days characters on the glass, for instance, would have been unforgivable) I have to give the designers credit for the overall layout.
In addition to this aesthetically-pleasing design, the glass is solidly built. It's double-layered, so if you're drinking something hot you won't burn yourself, and this feature makes it very sturdy. You won't be breaking this sucker easily! Unfortunately, it's also a bit narrow, and this leads to the single worst feature of the glass: you can't really fit a whole lot of liquid in here.
Would I ever actually drink out of the Fonzie Glass on a regular basis? Maybe, but I'd have to think about it for a while. After all, Ant found this thing at the Good Will, and therefore only God and Fonzie himself knows where it's been.
All in all, though, I have to say that the Fonzie Glass would make a great addition to any household. It's built tough, and the all-important Fonzie Factor of the product is off the scale. You'll definitely feel coolamundo after drinking from it, and afterward you might just feel compelled to deliver the Fonz's most powerful catch-phrase: Aaaayyyyy!!